It's all about the costuming. And don't be ashamed of who you are. I've had stretch marks for years and a lot of people don't have a clue. -Freya

I am 35 and have gained a lot of weight over the past 10 years. I've started to lose that, and in the wake, I have some stretch marks, some lumps (which are slooooowly going away), and I am a curvy girl (all top and bottom with a little middle).

I only started a little under a year ago--and as a formerly thin girl who was now a heavier girl, I was very self conscious. I felt like I had to be thinner...at least down to where I was at 25...before I'd go public. What sort of eased my mind was actually having a very young (16) very thin girl (who was taking classes at our studio) approach me at one of the studio only Haflas and telling me that she wished she had curves like mine because the curvier dancers looked better. I weighed about 245lbs then. So to say I was floored is an understatement.

After I finally do a public performance or two, I was very surprised that most of the people who had any sort of reaction were supportive and thought it was admirable that I wasn't afraid to just go out and dance. On the inside, before I actually did get out there, the most prominent worry in my mind was that people would judge. But they didn't. I haven't lost much, btw, in terms of pounds. But I have shaved off about 20 inches since last August and it's becoming quite noticeable. I'm still over 200lbs (about 30lbs over), but I'm less self-conscious about it.

What it boils down to is this: if you love belly dancing, and it makes you feel beautiful and feminine, and centers you (which all applies to my own experience) then it doesn't matter how big, small, round, thin, flat, tall or short you are. That feeling of beauty and femininity and grounding will radiate. And those who are watching, who truly appreciate what you are doing, will see THAT...not the aesthetics.

Forgot to add: You look amazing! If you want to sort of hide the stretch marks (if you're still not sure about them being obvious) you can always play with glitter, body paint, temporary tattoos, or costuming. I don't think you should hide them at all. But that's just me.

This is me about three months ago performing my first solo

people.tribe.net/f8a2a230-...5dc3af4ef1

I think you should dance no matter what! You have beautiful hips by the way. That's really why I replied, I have nothing much to say about stretch marks except that I rarely notice them until a dancer points at herself and says "look at my stretch marks." You said you aren't ashamed of 'em, so that's sort of the answer right there, in my opinion.

You look fantastic!
One of the joys of belly dance is that it allows women of all shapes and sizes to celebrate themselves. Curvy girls are the sexiest of all!
Also, one of the origins of belly dance was to prepare young women for childbirth, so one could say that stretch marks are an emblem of that tradition. :)

Hunny...the best thing about belly dance (as some others have said) is the fact that it celebrates the female body in all it's forms...goddesses come in all shapes and sizes and it matters not which one you are...celebrate your femininity and just get out there and DANCE!!!

As far as the stretch marks go...they will fade with time...and you earned every single one of those...I've still got a few from my kids, of which the youngest is now 14, but they're to the point that even I don't really notice them anymore...you're young and your body will bounce back much sooner than you think...especially with the benefits that dancing will give you...believe me, once you've been doing it for a while, you'll learn to embrace every single curve and every single mark of your womanhood...you'll have a confidence you never thought was possible!

Good luck and have lots and lots of fun!!!

Gurrrrrrl--you have beautiful hips! No worries--those stretchmarks WILL fade. It's not the package we travel through life in but how we move through life that matters.

There is no such thing as being too big for bellydance. When I first came to bellydance about three years ago, I felt pretty awful about my body image. I had recently gained some weight and had been in a toxic relationship where he made me feel bad about myself. Bellydance made me love myself again. And it continues to do so :)

i have a son as well who is now 3 and i found that more people love looking at my stomach both when i was pregnant and after i had him than when i first started dancing. i was lucky enough to lose all the baby weight quickly, but i have friends who have stretch marks and cute tummies from having children and they are beautiful dancers. you are not nor ever too "big" to bellydance and stretch marks show what that you created a new life! i say be proud of how you look!

I have to weigh in on this one. I feel for you, not because I've had a child but because I used to weigh 330 lbs and I've lost over 180 lbs over six years. There are stretch marks, there's loose skin, and places that will never go away without surgery. The first time I ever showed up at a hafla, I wore a top that covered my stomach. I also wore something over my arms as well. I didn't want anyone to see it. Then, a few ladies danced. They were *awesome* dancers, and all of them larger than I am. They certainly didn't think they looked bad - and they didn't! It's very much a matter of perspective. What you see, not everyone else will see in you. Your belly is most likely perfect, but we always see our flaws so much worse than anyone else.

I forgot to share this: a very good friend of mine (male) jokingly asked me to show him how my belly rolls were coming along (he once dated a cab dancer), and I said that my up to down were pretty good but the down to up were still struggling. It was his birthday and so I humored him with a demonstration. In the middle of it, he put his hands on my stomach and felt the movement.

I'm very, very self conscious of my stomach since I gained weight. Later he asked me why I sort of stutter rolled (his words not mine) and I explained. He could not understand WHY I was so self conscious "because you are more than your stomach." Just that has done wonders for the way I see myself.

Everyone here is BEAUTIFUL. And in this instance, size does not matter.